The First Week

Inspiration

I'd seen oceans before, sure. But this...

This... beauty. So blue.
No. Green.
Yet white and transparent.

Pinks and oranges and golds slowly began to glitter across the waves.

I closed my eyes and breathed in the salty air of the shore.
I didn't smell fish, or garbage like the man made beach back home.

This place smelled like harmony. Bittersweet paradise.

& my stomach turns

How can I allow myself to enjoy this without my best friend?

I shut my eyes and imprinted the image into the back of them. Thinking that maybe, somehow I could share this through the air, across the country, like magic.

After all, that's what this entire experience felt like anyway.

My body filled with warmth from the sun on my back and the sand tickling my toes. The sound of all the people actually making me feel more calm. 

                     then why do I feel so empty

In the distance, I spot a pair of kids collecting broken shells and sea glass. A brother and sister judging by the way he would shelter the tiny girl from the oncoming waves. 

They ooh and point and analyze the ground every couple of feet.

I look down at my own feet and pick up a pearly purple half shell.

                                                       I wonder if the other half is nearby.

18 Years

All my life has been spent on mud roads. By the time I was 8, I knew every kid I'd ever know in that town. I'd be in school with them forever. 

At 10 years old, I met my soul mate. Sam was a knobby-kneed little thing with straw hair. She had teeth too big for her mouth, and a mouth too big for her own good.

 By the time we were 12, you wouldn't catch one of us without the other. And if you did, you'd know there was something to worry about. 

When we were 13, Sam and I'd spend our days swinging from ropes and fishing for nothing in the canal behind our land. 

When we turned 16, we'd take dad's truck to the old steel bridge and dare each other to jump. That truck never did stay clean for more than a day. 

We were sisters for the better part of our lives. We'd share stories of all the adventures we'd have together. Once we were grown, we were gonna leave this ruddy redneck town and do something worth doing. We were gonna move into the city together. Work at a desk all day and paint the town all night. We'd meet artists and celebrities and dance and reminisce.

Now we're 18. And I'm leaving town. And Sam isn't. And I'm scared.